Getting ready for coaching: do we do centering exercises?

Some coaches use exercises to help the client focus and settle into the coaching session:

- Mindfulness exercises like body scans

- Breathing exercises

- Movement (for example related to “Chakras”)

- Somatic exercises

- And many more

The coach will guide the client through the respective exercise before the coaching session or even during the coaching session when the coach thinks it may be beneficial to the client.

Are you noticing anything about the previous sentences? “The coach” is always the subject of the sentence and not the client. “The coach” thinks it may be beneficial. “Some coaches” use exercises, etc.

In coaching, we center the client. The coaching is about the client and the client’s preferred ways of growing and developing, not about the coach’s frame of reference and techniques. Even if the coach is convinced that “the client needs to connect with their body / breath / xyz chakra more” that hypothesis is clearly part of the coach’s thinking and not about the client. Now, if a coach is very attached to their hypotheses it may be that they overlook that they are coming from “their truth” and not “the truth”. In my view, imposing “my truth” on the client is disrespectful and bordering on the unethical – however well intended it may be by the coach.

So what can a coach do if the thought arises: “This client might really benefit from a few deep breaths now!” A quote attributed to Steve de Shazer is: “When you have a hypothesis, take two aspirin and wait until it passes.” So that is option number one: Ignore the hypothesis and start re-focusing on the client. Option number two: Share your observation with the client, describe the exercise and ask the client if they would like to try it. This might sound like:

Coach: “Hey, I am noticing that we usually start our session with chit chat and it seems to me that you are sometimes so busy in your head with many things that it takes us a while to focus on what is really important for you today – what do you think?”

Client: “Yeah, you are right, I was thinking the same.”

Coach: “I am wondering if you would be up for trying something different. I am trained in mindfulness meditation and have a focusing exercise that might give you a different experience. I would guide you through something called “body scan” where you direct your attention to parts of your body, starting from the feet up. It often helps people to focus. Would you like to try it?”

Client: “Why not?”

Coach: “You can stop this exercise any time, just let me know, ok?”

Client: “Sure!”

Coach: “Take a few deep breaths…”

After the body scan

Coach: “How was this for you?”

Client shares their experience and how helpful (or not) this was

In my view the client needs to fully understand what the exercise entails, what it is for, why the coach thinks it is a good idea. The client also needs to be able to stop the exercise at any time or reject it without feeling that they are insulting the coach.

If you would like to discuss these or other coaching questions, share exercises, learn about our programs or just hang out with us, come to one of our free meetups and exchanges!

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